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hiphop-elements.com • View topic - mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2

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 Post subject: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/12/10 04:31:08 PM 
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since i doubt this would have been forever in the first thread, heres a new one..


all this guy knows is alot about nothing
ya gotta poor poker face that id love to lace
see if im bluffing
drastic gets beat into stuffing
i stay well fed, you keep huffing and puffing
that shiney hot head get shot dead with a P90
i got, 360 degrees of.. ya know what, forget about description
just step in my position the cogs and pistons
fire off ammunition in all directions
and even if you go into hiding
i'll draw you out like a blueprint
make you squint at my shine like lookin through a tint window
starr will eat the white in you ya little junior mint
ima evil black widow, sharper than a crack needle
that go deep beyond your tactics
might have C4 in the mattress waitin for this actress to practise incest
then explode my load on la familia
i told ya i'd kill ya
not knowin how, when, and where had dras rippin out hair
your lyrics scrape the bare minimum as of late
i puncture holes with my papermate through this featherweight
exposing gaps, accept the facts as i drop it on your lap
then clap this junkie and thats that

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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/12/10 04:35:38 PM 
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DT:


My words are flames, they will burn your career
Than all you have left is to be turnin to fear
Pound you down quick, than take a picture
How do you think the alien got in his signature?
Thats Mourningstarr after I smashed his face thats how satisfaction tastes,
im after lamesDopes emcee's, vets and legends
they call me the teacher, but don't expect a lesson
This will be a slaughter house after I smash this dude
than go on doing whatever like a regular afternoon
Hell, this dude has officially been chopped and screwed
I've stopped this fool, and made him eat my fist fuck it,
I'll end it now, you've been defeated bitch

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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/12/10 04:40:39 PM 
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Mourningstarr wrote:
DT:


My words are flames, they will burn your career
Than all you have left is to be turnin to fear
Pound you down quick, than take a picture
How do you think the alien got in his signature?
Thats Mourningstarr after I smashed his face thats how satisfaction tastes,
im after lamesDopes emcee's, vets and legends
they call me the teacher, but don't expect a lesson
This will be a slaughter house after I smash this dude
than go on doing whatever like a regular afternoon
Hell, this dude has officially been chopped and screwed
I've stopped this fool, and made him eat my fist fuck it,
I'll end it now, you've been defeated bitch

disregard this verse, i posted it wrong. drastic post your verse here.. or voters just look at original battle thread

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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/13/10 05:23:47 AM 
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Joined: 06/09/05 02:55:41 PM
Posts: 2973
Location: Maryland
My words are flames, they will burn your career
Than all you have left is to be turnin to fear
Pound you down quick, than take a picture
How do you think the alien got in his signature?
Thats Mourningstarr after I smashed his face
thats how satisfaction tastes, im after lames
Dopes emcee's, vets and legends
they call me the teacher, so expect a lesson
This will be a slaughter house after I smash this dude
than go on doing whatever like a regular afternoon
Hell, this dude has officially been chopped and screwed
I've stopped this fool, and made him eat my fist
fuck it, I'll end it now, you've been defeated bitch

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No matter the situation, life will still move on
You will never accomplish anything crying, no matter who's wrong - Drastic


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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/13/10 07:25:54 AM 
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Joined: 03/28/04 09:00:05 PM
Posts: 7722
Location: Canada
Shit this one was close

Starr- your flow was a bit choppy but you had sum good lines and decent punches

Dras- you had the better flo no doubt but like I said you battle to much and you lack consistant punches and it costs you because you use weak lines, be original come with heat expand your rhymes and vocabulary

round 2 I will give this to Dras just for a smoother verse

I suggest you 2 relax on the battle forum for a while
he'll take a week off from writting and come back re focussed

Pe@ce

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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/19/10 02:49:05 PM 
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Joined: 11/19/01 05:00:00 PM
Posts: 940
Location: MEDINA( BROOKLYN)
Mourningstarr, got this round he went at him harder, the verse read choppy because of the way you set those lines, you wasn't ending those line with the rhyme at the end, you just threw it up there

"that shiney hot head get shot dead with a P90
i got, 360 degrees of.. ya know what, forget about description
just step in my position the cogs and pistons
fire off ammunition in all directions"

that shiney hot head get shot dead with a P90
i got/
360 degrees of.. ya know what,/
forget about description/
just step in my position the cogs and pistons/
fire off ammunition in all directions/



Drastic, your verse was an easy read but, you need to get angry or something


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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/19/10 05:36:43 PM 
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Location: Maryland
1-1 tie so far, lets see what else we can cook up here.

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No matter the situation, life will still move on
You will never accomplish anything crying, no matter who's wrong - Drastic


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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/20/10 10:59:52 AM 
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thanks seven30 thats helpful crit..a rarity around this place now.

DT post rnd 3 when ready, i'll do the same. lets keep em coming.

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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/20/10 12:16:17 PM 
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Posts: 2973
Location: Maryland
Alright...

Im coming for the throat this time..

This dudes vision is dazed like he just woke up in the MOURNING
Leaving STARS around his head after the massacre im performing
You're as easy to hit as a none moving target
From the looks of the last round you're just as harmless
You start shit, than drop a none rhyming verse, Im coming harder than ever, this time its worse
Its my time burst, Im dying of thirst, Im out for blood, as i'm prying this jerk
Stop trying to front kid, you cant compete with this new shit
You drop an average track, as im laying back with the exclusives
The way I set the mood and beats I guess you can say im a producer
I MAKE this battle exciting, from the beat I will remove ya
Now that the time is here, I should come with more hits
With more power and more force, make it enormous
This CAT must have nine lives, I've crushed twice man
Now hes being a PUSSY, dude get a life, damn!
You keep coming at me, but yet you lack the force
AND STILL you want to keep this battle going back and forth
I will react of course, now this dude will get laid to rest
Don't be surprise when I get the win, I came the best

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No matter the situation, life will still move on
You will never accomplish anything crying, no matter who's wrong - Drastic


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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/24/10 08:19:06 PM 
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drastic don't budge unless i say so
because the rate at which he thinks
couldn't dodge a rolling pencil
and his most current rhymebook
i use as a receptical
for his remains and misfortune
that pumps through the veins
his mom shoulda had an abortion
but she was heavy on the reigns
and grew this fuck up
ya know what dras, give the fuck up
you rang up short changed
i haven't aged in decades
you'll be catching bouquets
for the rest of your days
reading "HomeSense" magazine
and dusting the place

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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/27/10 11:13:57 PM 
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Joined: 07/28/03 01:45:48 AM
Posts: 472
Location: In Satans shadow waitin'
I thought drastic edged both verses...

drastic don't budge unless i say so
because the rate at which he thinks
couldn't dodge a rolling pencil
-think about it, dodging a rolling pencil? It doesn't make sense or hit hard

you rang up short changed
-you had a good concept but it didn't hit...if you word it differently it would hit harder like "each time I battle dras I rang em up but got short changed" just something as simple as this makes it better in my opinion...

You're as easy to hit as a none moving target
From the looks of the last round you're just as harmless
-getting better

This CAT must have nine lives, I've crushed twice man
Now hes being a PUSSY, dude get a life, damn!
-doesn't really make sense your saying you crushed him twice then he's being a pussy by coming back for more and you're telling him to get a life?
-maybe something like "ain't you got anything better to do than getting verbally beaten" instead of your 2nd line here...

All in all I'm just trying to help you guys...you need to be more direct and harder hitting...even like a comedian when he's/she's clowning on peeps it's like the same thing....

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Saying I ain't worthy?
Now you pushed me, to the edge like rapists, I don't respect you pussys
Now ya hooked with shook speech...


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 Post subject: Re: mourningstarr vs drastic tactics rnd 2
PostPosted: 04/28/10 01:43:55 AM 
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thanks t=for the crit...i looked back on the "rolling pencil" line after i posted and thought, wtf wait thats weak lol.

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